A reader writes:
For the past six months, I have been searching for a job after a long-term contract job ended. I am 56, with years of experience in communications and administrative work and a masters degree in library science. I very much want to work for a local company which specializes in information for libraries and researchers. I’ve applied to this company several times. Two years ago, I also had a short-term temporary job there, from which I was asked to leave because I could not control my sleep apnea and was suffering from daytime sleepiness there. I am happy to say my sleep apnea is finally under control. I contacted my old supervisor there earlier this year. Old Supervisor was glad to hear I’m in better health and said to check their website for openings. I did, and applied for three jobs there this summer. I have also applied, unsuccessfully, to other companies. I have been offered another position subcontracting at a government agency — but it’s temporary, very low-paying, and the necessary background check is taking weeks and weeks to complete.
Last month I finally had a successful phone interview with one of this company’s internal recruiters, who agreed I have strong qualifications for either a customer service role or the job I would love to have and for which I believe I am well qualified, information editor. Two weeks ago, I interviewed for the customer service position and was not chosen. I did not get an interview for the editor position and assumed they either interviewed other candidates or closed that position. After my customer service interview, I saw the editor job had been reposted. Within minutes after my customer service rejection letter was emailed, I called the recruiter and restated my interest in the editor job. And I waited. And I waited. For a week. No return call, no email. Just silence.
Yesterday morning, I left a voicemail for the recruiter again asking about the editor job. At 11:45 a.m., while on my way to the retail job I’ve taken to attempt to survive, I called him again. I again asked about the editor job being reposted and said that I was still interested. He said he received my earlier voicemail, and he was about to call me. He denied the job had been reposted/said it should not have been reposted (it was), and asked me if it was a posting for the same job in their southern office. No, it wasn’t for the southern location, it was at their midwestern headquarters. He then said they were extending an offer that day to a contractor who has been in the information editor job and, he said, it would have been difficult for me to go against this experienced candidate. He said I’m welcome to reapply to other positions there and to email him whenever I do.
I then spent five minutes sobbing uncontrollably in my car, punching into work late because I was trying to get myself under control before coming in, and the rest of the day struggling not to cry or get angry at customers who had nothing to do with it all. At home last night, my frustrations about this and my other unsuccessful job searching experiences exploded while my roommate listened and offered what little advice she could. I have exhausted the meager savings I had from my last contract job. I cannot pay my rent, car insurance, phone bill, and my medical debts with a poor-paying retail job. I am sick of unsuccessfully job hunting. I DO NOT want to work in retail anymore even though my roommate and my aunt keep saying I ought to go into retail management. I am also tired of contract/temp work not leading to permanent jobs for me.
I’m angry with the recruiter for not returning my call last week. He says he prefers to communicate with candidates through email because he’s on the phone all day (plus, he’s a millennial, and they seem to prefer electronic communication). But “being on the phone” is a big part of a recruiter’s job! And I wanted to tell him, quickly, during a short break from my retail job, after I received the rejection, that I was still very interested in the editing job. If I had emailed him, I suspect he wouldn’t have returned that either. I also feel lied to: Why would he deny the job was reposted, ask if I was mistaken about where it was located (he ought to know where his company’s job openings are located) and then say they were extending someone else an offer for it? Someone suggested posting to Glassdoor about the recruiter’s behavior, but I’m afraid someone at the company would figure it out and hold it against me. And I still want to work there!
Should I reapply the next time this or another job is posted? Did my previous bad experience there blackball me, and the recruiter can’t come out and say it? Did I shoot myself in the foot by calling him twice in one morning? Can I trust him? Could part of this be age discrimination? Should I contact the company’s HR department about his behavior and hope HR tells him to clean up his act? And how can I better manage feeling so desperate that every rejection after an interview or situation like this sends me into a tailspin of depression and anger? I need help and advice — and a much better job.
I’m so sorry you’re dealing with all these frustrations.
The thing is … the recruiter hasn’t really done anything wrong here.
You’re right that being on the phone is a big part of his job — when it comes to phone interviews and so forth. But he’s allowed to prefer to use email when it comes to communicating about status updates (many people who deal with hiring do, because when candidates get them on the phone, they often argue). Also, when you’re dealing with a huge volume of candidates, email is often more efficient. (I’d avoid thinking of it as a millennial thing; I’m not a millennial and I work the same way, as do lots of others.)
As for why he’d deny the job was reposted — the most likely answer is that it was just a mistake, not an intentional lie. He might not have realized it had been reposted already (sometimes it happens automatically, or someone else in his office could have handled it), or he might have simply had his mind on something else and gotten it wrong; it happens. It’s possible he deliberately lied about it, but that’s pretty unlikely, since you’d said that you’d already seen it, and recruiters are usually pretty comfortable rejecting people.
It’s not great to call twice in one morning. It’s going to look pushy/impatient. And you are feeling impatient, and that’s perfectly understandable! But you’ve got to remember that you can’t expect to transfer that over to an employer — it’s reasonable that they won’t feel the same urgency around getting you an immediate answer that you feel. They’ve got lots of other priorities and lots of other candidates they’re juggling. It’s unlikely that you’re going to be blackballed for doing it; just remember that it’s not something to do in the future.
What is more likely is that, yes, your previous experience there might be getting in the way of them hiring you now. If your sleepiness meant that you weren’t on the ball during your temp job there, they might have serious reservations about giving you another shot. Legally, you might be protected by the Americans with Disabilities Act (it will depend on details of how your condition affected you), but they might have concluded (possibly rightly) that some of the problems they saw went beyond those protections. It’s hard to say without hearing their take, but if they weren’t impressed last time, that could definitely be a factor now.
Could it be age discrimination? Sure, it could be. But the far more likely possibility is that it’s based on your previous work there. If you have pretty good rapport with your old manager and trust her to give it to you straight, one option is to take her out to coffee, tell her you’re having trouble getting re-hired, and ask if she thinks your previous time there might be the obstacle. She may or may not tell you the truth, but there’s nothing to lose by trying.
But ultimately, the big thing here is that you can’t make this employer hire you by sheer force of will. They could have reservations from your previous work together that you’re not going to be able to overcome. Or they could think you’re great, but someone else just keeps ending up being better. (And the recruiter’s mention that they hired someone who was already doing the work as a contractor could be an example of that — if that person was already doing well in the role, it’s hard to compete with that.) Or you may never know what the answer is, which is frustrating … but it’s so much less frustrating to accept that than to try to find a way to force it.
(And definitely don’t contact HR to complain; that will make you look bad because there really isn’t much to complain about here, and will decrease your future chances there.)
The best thing you can do is to lighten your focus on this company. By all means, keep applying there if they have positions that you’re strongly matched with. But assume that it just might not work out there, and don’t emotionally invest in them. Focus more on other places.
I know that’s easier said than done, especially when this company feels like it’s the way out of a very crappy situation. But if it’s not actually going to be the way out, you’re better off making other plans, even if they’re not your first-choice or even second-choice plans. I’m sorry because I know that sucks and isn’t what you want to hear.
But if you knew you were never going to work at this company, what would you do instead? Whatever that is, focus there. It doesn’t have to be retail management! There are lots of other things a library science degree qualifies you for — start looking at those things, and investing there instead of in this company that so far isn’t offering you much.
And make a point of investing in the non-work pieces of your life too. When work is this frustrating and depressing, it helps to have other things — friends, family, volunteer work, pets, hobbies — to lean into. I’m not suggesting that’s a panacea — it’s not — but it will help.
Good luck.
did this recruiter lie to me? and why can’t I get hired by this company? was originally published by Alison Green on Ask a Manager.
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